Tag: family

Posted on

The Choice is Yours: Are You Powerless or Powerful?

Have you ever heard someone say, “The choice is yours to make”?

At one point in your life, you have been forced to make a decision. Maybe it was where to eat dinner, what to eat for dinner, whether or not to break up with your significant other, or to stay at your job or leave.

We are faced with hundreds, thousands, of decisions in life every single day. Decisions are just part of life. Unfortunately, there are times when we cannot be in control and we have to let someone else decide for us.

But…

There are also several times in life when we just choose not to make a decision. We choose to just leave the cards on the table and deal with it later.

Compare this thought to your addiction – is someone forcing you to stay an addict or are you deciding that for yourself? Even if you just aren’t making an effort to fix it, ultimately, you are deciding to stay sedentary with your addiction.

Each day that you wake up and decide to continue letting the addiction control your life, you are ultimately deciding to be powerless.

Wow…that hits you right where it hurts, doesn’t it?

Why would you ever decide to be powerless?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93TUSjXhht0

Well, the thing is you probably don’t think about it like that right off the bat. You are not literally choosing to be powerless, but you are choosing not to be powerful and overcome the addiction.

Free stock photo of person, woman, girl, addiction

So, it is time to wake up and choose to be powerful.

Did you know you can do that? You have the ability to choose to change your own story.

Choose recovery. Choose powerful. Choose yourself.

Start by admitting to yourself that you have problem, then decide you are ready to make a change, then start working on it.

Part of being powerful is deciding to better yourself. Part of being powerful is deciding to make a change.

You have to decide what is more important to you and decide to follow through.

Part of power is following through.

Look for treatment options that you think will work best for you – conventional or nonconventional. Then, reach out to those people and make that first step.

You will be surprised how much power you feel when you just simply take that first step to making a difference.

Don’t wait any longer. Your future is at stake. Start today. Choose to be powerful and not powerless.

Posted on

Can You Overcome Codependence?

Do you ever find yourself so focused on something and someone else that you almost don’t even remember what you did all day?

It is as if you have been in a daze all day…almost like you have been hypnotized.

You might find yourself fixated on one person always thinking:

  • What are they doing?
  • Are they using me?
  • Should I be helping them instead?

Oftentimes, those who love and/or live with an addict find themselves in this situation – especially parents and spouses.

Free stock photo of cold, fashion, man, couple

By definition, codependence is an unhealthy relationship in where one person helps or enables another person’s addiction – whether it be drugs, alcohol, sex, or something else.

Typically, this is seen in parents as they feel obligated to give their child money, but then the child is just going and using that for drugs and alcohol so therefore, the parent is enabling them.

However, this can also be seen when the parent or spouse just feels guilty for not monitoring the person. For example, they might go on vacation and feel guilty the entire time because the addict is at home alone which leaves them susceptible to abusing their substance of choice.

So, can you really overcome the sadness and anxiety that stems from codependence?

Yes. But, it is not easy.

You are not the addict.

While you might almost feel as though you are, you are not the one who is addicted. The addict is making their own decisions. You have to remember that they are an adult and have free will.

Just don’t do it.

If you are the person who is giving them money or something that you know is enabling them – don’t. Instead, buy them food or clothes, whatever it is they claim they need the money for. This can be compared to how some people will only give homeless people food or gift cards rather than cash. Unfortunately, this is how it has to be with addicts too.

You are not responsible.

If you are the other type of codependent and just feel guilty for not monitoring them constantly, remind yourself that you are not responsible for them. Don’t dwell on that you could be home instead of on vacation or that you could have sent them to rehab instead of buying a new car.

The reality of it is that you still have to live your life and for their recovery to be successful, it has to start with their own decision to make a difference.

Guilt felt by the outsiders in the life of an addict can be great. It can leave you feeling as though you are the addict. Just remember, do the best you can but continue living your life and avoid things that enable their addiction.